Three of my Nightmares

1. I get married. My dress is red only because every inch of my body is bleeding. Nobody stops me. I am dragged down the aisle in beat to the piano playing. Duh, duh, duh, duh. I don’t scream. I get married.

2. I’m held down by several hands. They are laughing as they cut designs into me. There’s penetration. There’s menacing guffaws. I can’t understand what’s so funny. I don’t scream. I know by now it’s never ending. The scream grows like a tumor deep within my belly. I feel it growing fingernails and eyelids, it’s own wild heartbeat.

3. People are reading my poetry. The other bartender asks me if all my poems are so graphically sexual, or just the few he’s read. I blush and stutter that I am not my pseudonym. People know exactly where I’ve been. I wake up with a start, frantically checking to be sure I haven’t published anything.

(This last one is both a recurring nightmare and actually happening.)

6 thoughts on “Three of my Nightmares

    1. ❤ Aurora ❤ I shut it down when the other bartender said something and brought it back when a waitress quoted me. I need to stop listening to people and listen to you, who i imagine is not so much a person as a mermaid. I adore you and im grateful for your words, always. thank you.

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