First Appointment Jitters

When I’m setting up the appointment
and trying very hard
not to leave extraneous voice messages
I want more than anything
to seem like a non threatening
sane person

why am I preoccupied
with making a good impression
on my new therapist
when I’m only going to then
sit down and tell her
all these fucked up things

i guess I want to seem
like a person worth helping
She asks a question
and I say I’m so excited to meet her
but this seems
like the wrong answer
so she has to repeat it

“So, love,
do you have insurance?”

“I’ll pay in cash.
Thank you for doing this.”

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