How Not to Marry an American

“What kind of a woman
whisks a mother’s only son
Away to Saudi Arabia?
Last I checked,
he just wanted to go
to an amusement park.”

“Come on, Mrs. B,
it’s a really good
job opportunity.”

“I swear to god,
if you take that boy
away from me…
Gladys, hold my earrings!
I want to show this woman
a thing or two
about the nature of ISIS.
It has alot to do
with mother son relationships
when they’re threatened…
Don’t you dare take my son
off of this continent.”