On turning thirty


  1. Clear up my acne so I can focus on wrinkles. I’m almost 30.
  2. Surgically remove my remaining baby teeth for the same reason
  3. Submit to the top literary magazines
  4. Make necessary apologies and redactions to various members of the local writing community
  5. Drop out of my shitty, two-bit school and apply for an MFA
  6. Privatize the previous statement to avoid any hurt feelings
  7. Pay my outstanding citations
  8. For the first time in my life, do my taxes
  9. Try to avoid handing in any finals from a jail cell this semester, like my father

To remember:

Bukowski’s teeth were also rotten

I am not the first poet to come from nothing

2 thoughts on “On turning thirty

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