“So, explain to me what it’s like, this PTSD
because most of the time, you act all right
but just last week, the things you were saying
didn’t make sense, and you were really jumpy.”
“Yeah. Most of the time, I’m fine
but if I feel threatened, it’s like I stop
being able to see clearly. It feels like running
from a life or death situation. Like a spy movie.
and the things that set it off range from
seeing the face of someone from my past
having an argument, watching a movie
having a particularly bad dream, or even
thinking thoughts im not supposed to think.
then, i lose sleep and thats the kicker of it
if i wasn’t insane immediately
just add a couple of fitful nights
and my brain starts
“Well, that’s ok,
forget about it
we all have our ticks
i didn’t mean to bring it up again.
Anyways, would you care for a drink?”
“Yeah, thanks. it’s really reassuring
to admit that i can lose my mind
in an instant, and then to be
invited in, and just continue having
a casual conversation.”
“Mmmm. It’s called friendship.
Anyways, it doesn’t seem to affect you that often.”
“Yeah, not so much anymore.
and you know why? Because I make sure
I don’t see people from my past,
I don’t have arguments, I don’t watch movies
I take sleeping pills and I try not to think.
It’s actually been going pretty great.
Oh, and plus, the other medications.”
“Speaking of which, here’s your drink!”