Walking tour

“When I was in college once

I was toddling drunk on this street

And blacked out

The next thing I knew I was facedown on my floor

Next to a bucket of vomit,”

“Oh, that’s horrifying!”

“I know, right? That was my bedroom in that blue victorian

On the third floor

That’s where I jerked off the most

Probably like, at least twice a day

The whole time I was in college.”

“Oh, charming…and also kind of sad. And now I get to walk past it every morning.”

“I know, you’re lucky. This is such a nice neighborhood. I love looking at these houses.”

“Yeah, well. I was actually thinking–we should revisit that conversation we had about moving.”

“Where did you say you wanted to go? Texas?”

“Oh, I don’t care anymore. Anywhere, really.”


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