I’m so mad at you that I’m writing a Russian novel about the way you blew me off

She was my friend when you weren’t
not only did she say I could visit her
but that I could stay for months

you didn’t even say
it’d be nice to see you, but
so now you are the downtrodden character
in my novel, who will eventually die
all alone in the Siberian forest
from frostbite, maybe, I haven’t decided yet

but the important part is the phone in your hand
which will be bagged for evidence
by the local police department who will contact me
because after all these years
I was the person you ended up texting
at the end of your life, you will think of me

and I will say, sorry
I don’t understand Russian
What is this, some sort of a scam
no, I don’t want your prince’s money
in a lump sum and I wont give you my information
and I will hang up on them even though they said your name
it will have been too heavily accented
and too far lost by then for me to comprehend

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4 thoughts on “I’m so mad at you that I’m writing a Russian novel about the way you blew me off

  1. Holy shit GG what a fucking shutdown. This is epic,😂🤘🖤🖤🤘🤘
    Hope you are well, sorry that I’ve been away. Kiss the puppy for me 🤗🍻

    1. And here I thought no one liked it! I knew I could count on you-missed you! Consider him kissed and fed steak in your honor! Xoxo

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