Ok, so we come from slightly different backgrounds

“I wanted to elope. I’m doing this for you, goddamnit.”

“Well I’m sorry that my family…really loves me alot and would probably love to see me get married.”

*intense stare*


“Did you really just say that?”

*nervous laughter on both our parts*

“Yeah. Should I be sorry?”

“Well, it was a little insensitive. But its nice you want to give them a wedding. Ok, I’ll book the venue. You send out the invitations.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to feel horrible. If it’s really important to you, we can elope.”



“Ahem. I said ‘Nah. We’ll get through this.'”


Hey Jealousy

Who knew that anyone would get so petty

About the fact that I’m getting married

Right down to judging the validity of my dress?

I DID. That’s why we’re eloping.

Fuck All Y’all (it’s my party)

My one and only is an only child

So we can tell his parents

In fact, they can even be our witnesses

At the courthouse

Where I’ll wear my favorite

Dark blue dress

And not tell anyone else

And my favorite thing right now

About my fiance

Is not only that he’ll allow

This quietude

But that he understands it

And maybe in ten years

I’ll decide to go home

With my nine year old baby